HOME Rock Around the Dock.
Written by:
Anthony Hummerston.
STARRING:
Rojic,
Jimmi,
Karnov,
Niall,
Kory,
Mama
And special guest stars:
Hen3ry , Joe-9T, Hen3ry, 'Blinkie' and 'Trio,'
as the droids.
AND
Storm Cutter
their patched-up wreckage.
Special guest: Major Castor D'Estrella
Either Karnov isn’t listening, or the facts are getting in the way of a good argument.
“I can’t believe they made you a Jedi knight!” She yells at Niall, indignantly.
“I can’t either- because I’m not! -Yet!”
Karnov is in full flow, and nothing short of a separatist invasion is going to put her off.
“After all. You’re only service corps, or as I think of them: ‘Latrine cleaners!’”
Niall is sticking to his guns…. “I’m not yet a knight, only a padawan….And Mistress Luce has gone out on a very long limb to make that happen.”
“Well if I were on the council, you’d be busted so low that you’d be saluting the painting droids….Again!”
Niall isn’t rising to the argument. “Well, seeing as how I out-ranked you during my time in the corps, now that I’m a padawan….” He stresses: “–The same as you, Karnov- I have actually taken a demotion….And might I add: -With very good grace.”
Karnov changes tack.
“But master Junn said I was a knight…” Karnov protests.
“You are…Only you haven’t passed all the trials yet….The same as me!”
Karnov is quiet for a moment. Niall starts to think about calm things, desperately keeping his temper in check the way that he’s been taught.
“I feel so disappointed and let down by my master.” Karnov laments.
Niall nods sagely. “Now there’s something I can relate to…..”
Karnov can see the wisdom in Niall’s words, even though she doesn’t know to what Niall is referring. She calms down, although the issue is still far from being resolved. Niall turns back to his work, Karnov starts gathering lightsabre parts again. Someone has been waiting patiently for this moment of peace.
Joe-9T pipes up, “Of course, one padawan can always outrank another….” He tosses like a seismic grenade into the argument. This starts it all off again, even more heated than before!
Colonel D’Estrella can hear the raised voices from far across the docking apron. He considers turning back and finding another crew to help him. Although the nature of the argument intrigues him for several reasons. As he walks around the ship he spies Rojic hovering, with a death-stick on the go, chewing at the end, and puffing great plumes of smoke –despite the ‘no smoking’ signs. He is barking orders at a team of droids.
“Come on! Keep going! Don’t worry about the stripes! Just get that paint on quickly….” Rojic sounds slightly panicked. “Before Mama gets back!”
D’Estrella can’t help but chuckle at the scene. A dozen painting droids are painting the hull of Storm Cutter. The first four are applying crisp, bright, and very fresh white paint. Another group are applying broad red lines, along the ship’s axis, -like go-faster stripes. The remaining droids are painting in hasty strokes up, down, and diagonally. Blending the paint, and making the whole ship a slightly-swirly-but-very-rosy pink colour!
“Nice painting….” The colonel comments as he ascends the ramp toward the sound of Karnov’s arguing.
“Thanks.” Rojic shouts over the din.
The colonel stops. “Though I don’t suppose Mama will thank you for it.”
Rojic is puzzled. “No?”
“No. I expect she’ll shoot!”
Rojic thinks. After a pause, and a sideways glance, he says, “Well I’m hoping that it’ll be dark before she gets back.”
"No more pink!"
The colonel stops. “Where did she go, by the way?”
“She went to see Kory. I expect they’re having a little…. Um….Tryst…..”
The colonel is rather surprised. “Tryst?”
Rojic lies through his tusks. “Yeah…..”
After a moments thought, the colonel says, “A bit ‘May to December’ isn’t it?”
Rojic puffs away on the death-stick. “Well….The politically correct phrase would be something like: ‘Seventy-three B.B.Y to Forty-Seven B.B.Y.”
The colonel does a swift calculation in his head. “I didn’t know that Mama was that old….Or young….” He catches the glint in Rojic’s eye, “Or even that way inclined….”
Rojic is rumbled. “Okay. I lied. – They’re scouting out a cargo for the war effort.”
“Phew!” The colonel is relieved.
Rojic starts prattling on. “’Course there’s nothing wrong with same-sex relationships nowadays. We’re so much more tolerant. –But in the Old Republic days, such things were forbidden….Nay, physically and literally impossible. We’re so much more liberal now…..Enlightened even. I daresay that within a generation, kissing one’s sibling passionately on the lips in front of one’s future husband will be acceptable….” He stops talking, when he notices the colonel staring at him. “What?”
The colonel doesn’t really have time for this, but he explains why he’s been staring at Rojic. “I couldn’t help noticing the red spots… have you come down with some nasty tropical disease….?”
“Eh? What?” Rojic panics, and puts a hand to his face.
“Only there’s a virulent strain of avian flu going around….And the Rakghoul plague....And the virulent Qun wing-rot….”
Rojic desperately dabs at the spots and is relived that they are only spatters from the paint. He snarls at the colonel, but D’Estrella has long-since hot-footed it up the ramp, around the sofa, and into the argument.
“But you’re a Jedi and I’m not. It’s so unfair!” Karnov is getting cross.
“I’m not…. I’m a padawan….same as you…..” Niall says calmly, for what is probably the tenth time. The colonel coughs politely.
“Colonel on the bridge….” Joe-9T announces. “Or actually in the scruffy cargo hold….”
Rojic flutters in. “Damn! Forgot to recalibrate the sentry guns again!”
The colonel addresses them all. “I’m here to ask a favour……A favour for the Republic.”
Niall is calm. “Sure. Anything to help. Would you like some tea?” He shoots a look at Karnov. “It’ll help you relax…..”
Karnov is ready to start another argument. “You’re starting to sound like your mistress.”
Niall ripostes immediately, “-And you are starting to sound like Master Junn.”
Karnov backs down. “Touché!”
Joe-9T energises his protocol circuit. “Maybe if we listened to the colonel, we could find some few inches of mutual ground.”
The others shrug. “Okay.”
Niall smoothes over the situation. “Sorry, colonel, you were saying?”
D’Estrella outlines a task that he has for them.
“There’s a double agent –A Techno-Union foreman holed-up on Christophsis. He has been helping Republic navy intelligence for some time…..Only enemy agents have been threatening him and his family…..”
The colonel holds up a holo-projector. He talks over the image. “This is Le’an Zix, Techno-Union foreman. He has been invaluable to the war effort, but will no longer co-operate unless we move him here to Coruscant and arrange for his family to be smuggled from Skako to join him. I’d send a ship full of clones, but we – General Kosanna and myself- think it might be better handled by a small force of ‘civilian operatives.’
General Kosanna.
The colonel pauses. Some keys rattle behind him. “There’s a significant bounty on Le’an Zix….” The colonel and Rojic say in unison.
There is a beat.
The colonel and the Toydarian look at one another, slightly surprised. Rojic stops tapping at the keyboard and asks, “If we were to rescue him….My reward would be….?”
Everyone looks at Rojic. “What?” He asks.
“If there's a bright centre to the universe…..” The colonel starts to say.
“There’s always a low-down Toydarian lurking in the shadows, trying to make a fast buck!” The others all complete his sentence in unison.
Niall breaks the silence. “Finally, there’s something we can agree on!”
D’Estrella starts again. “As I was saying….This is something that must be under the radar. It’s very sensitive.”
“Are we still talking about Rojic’s rash? I hear there’s a virulent strain of tusk-worm going about.”
The others snigger.
“I can recommend a good 2-1B medical droid, sir.” Joe-9T purrs at Rojic. “Very discreet. Great bedside manner. Excellent surgeon, too. They only found that bit out the other day…. When he ripped off someone’s arm…..The droid’s an artist I tell you. Such violence! Such raw aggression! Such brutal disdain for life and ….-Limb.” He pauses for dramatic effect. “….And anaesthetics!” Rojic goes green, making his complexion a muddy brown colour.
D’Estrella stops Joe-9T’s eulogy. “It’s not like that at all. This is an escort mission.” Before he can retract that sentence the banter has started again in earnest.
Niall quips, “I’m not wearing that slave-girl outfit….”
The others chime in “Again!”
While they snigger, D’Estrella fills them in on their mission. – Though they haven’t chosen to accept it yet.
“Zix has been supplying us with essential intelligence…..” Rojic interrupts. “Those are two words that Karnov has never heard before…. ‘Essential’ and ‘intelligent.’”
D’Estrella clears his throat. In an exaggerated move, he adjusts his rank insignia and code-cylinders. “Of course I can get another crew….A cheaper crew….” This shuts Rojic up.
Niall has found some inner peace. “Please continue…..” He tells the colonel, calmly. He also shoots a venomous look at Rojic, and something in his manner makes the Toydarian shut up. Somehow this new calmer Niall is even more menacing than the old angry Niall.
“Zix has intel for the war effort, but, -as we have discovered- there is a bounty on his head. It is a dead-or-alive contract….Only the ‘alive’ clause has been replaced by ‘with extreme prejudice.’” The prominence of the contract has frightened him sufficiently that he has fled his handlers and gone to ground on Christophsis.”
Rojic interrupts, “Outer rim. Known for its mineral deposits and mining operations.”
“And….” Karnov promps.
The colonel continues, “-And he has refused to help the Republic any more until he is extracted and re-located to Coruscant. The ring of steel around the planet, and the presence of several thousand clone troopers is the only thing that’ll make him feel safe. – One also has to consider that his family might also be targeted.”
Karnov asks a sensible question. “So what do we know about him, this Le’an Zix?”
“He’s had positions in logistics, planning, strategy and intelligence. As an ‘asset’ they don’t come much bigger. My commanding officer, General Kosanna has put a high priority on Zix’s safety. –Which is why I chose you for this mission.”
Niall is suddenly business-like. “Chrisophsis is about a day’s travel away….”
“I’ll ping you some co-ordinates once you arrive.”
“Good. Rojic?”
“Yes?”
“Lay in some supplies. On the double. Stuff to bribe locals with, or maybe to hire some local muscle….. If there are bounty hunters closing in, we might need all the resources we can muster.”
“I’ll contact Kory. She’ll have some stuff here in no time. While we wait, I’ll kick the hyperdrive, and see if I can shave some hours off the journey time.”
Niall offers to contact Mistress Luce and Master Junn. “I’m sure they can spare the two of us for a day or two. Tisha has had me literally running around Coruscant for a week, -I could do with a break….”
“‘Tisha’ now is it?” Karnov asks. “I notice that Master Junn doesn’t let me call him by his first name…..” Niall gives her the ‘don’t even go there’ look, and for once Karnov takes the hint, and busies herself with prepping Storm Cutter for launch. She tactfully changes the subject. “What was that foreman’s name again?”
“Le’an Zix.”
“Not so easy to remember, besides, I think we should use a code-word…..Let me think…..Um….I know! -We’ll call him ‘George!’”
“George it is then!”
The colonel claps a palm to his forehead.
Joe-9T offers to scan the networks. “I’ll look for any chatter relating to Zix. –I mean ‘George’” He corrects himself. “Wait a millisecond….I’ll erase ‘Zix’ from my memory….” He flicks a switch. “There. Gone. Now what was I doing again?”
“Looking for George.”
“Who’s George?”
“He’s….Oh, Never mind!” Rojic types a few characters into the console. “There.”
“Thank you sir….” Joe-9T says, and then adds, “Whoever you are…..”
Rojic grins at him. “Just monitor all chatter around Christophsis. –And monitor ships in and out since the bounty was posted.”
“Will do sir.”
“Also, slice into the network and shave a few zeroes off the bounty.”
“Roger….Rojic!”
Rojic grins. In a whisper, he tells Joe-9T, “We can add a few dozen back on, -once he’s in the bag!”
Joe-9T adds, “At that point, I'll make sure his name goes on the blacklist. -That’s the list for the most elite of bounty-hunters.”
Rojic rubs his hands in glee at the prospect.
A few minutes later, Hen3ry beeps. Niall turns around. “Aha! Rojic! Your supplies are here….!”
Rojic flutters over. He ushers in a small fleet of loading droids, who deposit boxes and crates into the hold of the freighter.
“That was quick.” Niall observes, and then adds, “Thanks, droids.”
They reply, “Beep!”
“Kory’s done good. Essential supplies for trade, bribes, profit.... And oiling the wheels.”
Niall looks into a box. “This looks like fine Alderaanian brandy to me.”
“Like I said… ‘Oiling’….” Rojic grins.
“-Well oiling!”
There is a splashing sound from Karnov. “Ahh! This ‘oil’ bath is going to feel so good!”
D’Estrella tells them, “Good luck, and may the force be with you.” He turns to go.
“Up the Empire!” Rojic counters. This gets funny looks from the others.
“There isn’t an empire….Stupid!”
“There’s the Toydarian Empire. And I’m the emperor.” Rojic says, defiantly.
“I wonder if that homicidal 2-1B droid does psychoanalysis?” Karnov muses.
Niall says, “Anyone know that psychiatrist joke that Jimmi has been telling on the circuit?”
They all chime in together. “No.” The colonel pauses.
“Okay. I’ll tell you it now.”
Niall hops up onto a crate to deliver the joke. “I’m in therapy. It’s a thousand credits a session and I go twice a week. - I’ve been doing it for about twenty years. Nice little Rodian fella, my therapist. The other day, he said something to me that quite literally brought tears to my eyes……He said. ‘Actooley, Menoo dont-do talka-do de-basico!’”
The others fall about laughing. After a few minutes, they catch their breaths. “That’s a good one…. -You should tell Mama.”
“Jimmi did. I think she nearly wet herself!”
D’Estrella, whose Huttese isn’t that good, fails to see how it is funny. He waves them goodbye, and navigates around the sofa as he descends the loading ramp. Storm Cutter is still ringing with guffaws of laughter as he nods to his chauffeur, and climbs into the taxi.
When he is gone, Storm Cutter lifts into atmosphere and passes through the ring of ships surrounding Coruscant. They plug in Hen3ry, and he sets course for Christophsis. Meanwhile, Joe-9T scans the shipment. “Sir, I can’t help but notice that your fruit flavoured water has become contaminated with up to forty-five percent ethanol.”
Rojic is defensive. “So?”
“So, I’ll schedule a programme of disposal.”
Rojic flies at high speed to the droid. He pops open a hatch and fiddles with Joe-9T’s programming. “There!”
Joe-9T takes a minute to re-boot. His eyes light up and he performs the scan again.
“Sir! I can’t help but notice that your alcohol has become contaminated with fruit flavinoids!”
Karnov adds, “Sounds contaminated to me!”
Niall steps forward and takes a bottle. “We need to do more research…” He takes the bottle to the bridge. The others follow. Niall opens the stopper and takes a sip. After a second’s pause, his vision blurs. The stars elongate and he gets a terrible dizzy feeling. “I feel funny….”
Alderaanian brandy. Best before end of: Alderaan.
“Dont Panic! -It’s only the the ship. -We’ve jumped to hyperspace.”
Niall is sober again in an instant. “Whew! –I must admit that it’s been a few weeks since we did a hyperspace jump.”
Ignoring Niall, Rojic takes the bottle and glugs from it. “Glug…. Glug…. Glug…. Glug…. Glug…. Glug…. Glug…. Glug…. Glug…. Glug….(pause) Glug….Glug.Glug.Glug.Glug.Glug! Burp!”
Rojic flaps around drunkenly. His wings and arms flailing in all directions. He bounces off a bulkhead. “Ish….Ish….Blue! -I like blue! You’re all blue! Will you be my brothers?”
The others chuckle. “Great Rojic, but that’s not the alcohol, it’s spare chemicals for the head.”
Rojic hiccups a blue bubble; does an impression of a bluebottle, and flies off to sleep it off.
Joe-9T offers to dispose of the batch. “I’ll get rid of it ethically. I’ll tip it down the throat of the nearest wino.”
Niall is all business-like again. It doesn’t last long. “Well I’m going to get some rest. We’ll be there in….” He prompts Rojic, who has sobered up and who taps at a datapad. “Er…. About twenty-two hours.”
“Good. I need a sit-down. Mistress Luce has had me zipping all over town for the last week. Every errand, it’s: ‘Don’t take the taxi, Niall, –run!’ –I swear she’s devised some super-fitness programme.”
Karnov says, rather snidely, “Master Junn hardly ever lets me take the taxi….Or the river for that matter. -Maybe Mistress Luce likes her men lean and fit.”
“Maybe I’ll ignore that comment.” Niall says, sitting down. “Hey! Either I’m getting thinner, or the pilot’s seat needs some extra padding.”
“I think that Mama’s ample frame has padding of its own!”
Rojic Breezes in. “In some species, the female eats the male after copulation.”
There is a pause as everyone looks at him. Thoughts of Rojic copulating run through their brains. There is a collective: “Eeew!”
Niall gasps. “That thought made my chest heave.”
There is a beat. Then, with a twinkle in his eye, he adds, “By the way, has anyone seen Kory recently?”
A little while later, the others join Niall on the bridge. The stars are swirling in hyperspace, and Niall is resting his eyes.
Karnov says, “I’m bored. Is there anything on the radio?”
Rojic hovers in one place and starts flicking switches. Sweet tuneful music fills the bridge. Soaring strings, lovely harps and fruity brass. Rojic turns to the others. “Catalunya Musica anyone?”
Karnov asks for something else. “I was hoping for a simple folk song. –And fewer cats.”
Rojic fiddles with the dial. “Folk songs for simple folk, coming right up!” He finds some horrendous racket that sounds like the yowling of a wild Nexu impaled on a blunt stick, played at thirty-three-and-a-third. This wakes Niall from his deep meditation. “What,” He yells over the din, “Is that?” Rojic turns it down. “That,” he informs them, “Is the melodic sound of Mon Calamari throat-singing.”
A second later, he is looking at the wrong end of a gun. With eyes blazing, Karnov says through clenched teeth, “Play that again…. To my blaster!”
Relieving the tension, Joe-9T trudges up. “Did someone get sucked through a bullet hole in the windscreen?”
“No.”
“Only that’s what it sounded like, sir.”
Karnov is still seething. “That’s what’ll happen if Rojic ever plays that again.”
“Okay, okay!”
Karnov offers to take the pilot’s seat.
“I’ll take the pilot seat if you like.”
Niall gets up. “Fine. Take it. I was having such a lovely dream….”
Joe-9T offers to help with Karnov’s piloting. Karnov declines. “I don’t need a navigator, or anyone on comms, or indeed anyone to man the guns.”
“Droid the guns.”
“Okay, have it your way….Droid the guns.”
Joe-9T doesn’t take offence. “I was going to offer to attach the ‘P’ plates, ma’am.”
“‘P’ plates?”
“P….For Padawan.”
“Peth.” Niall corrects them.
“Yeah….Peth for Pathetic!” Rojic says, before Karnov can throw anything at him. Karnov turns to Niall. “I suppose you’d attach ‘J’ plates.”
“If such a thing was possible or indeed necessary in hyperspace….But I’d be content with a ‘P!’”
They all snigger. “‘Coz you’re not a Jedi.” Karnov adds.
“No. Not a Jedi. Still a padawan.” He turns to Rojic. “See? I’m agreeing with her!”
Karnov is not letting the matter rest. “Go off and clean a bog somewhere!” She snaps, somewhat unkindly.
Niall turns to go. “See me not rising to it?” He asks no-one in particular. As he turns on his heel he adds, -rather chillingly- “Yet!”
Some hours later, they are roughly halfway through their journey. Rojic is tinkering away with Trio the protocol droid. “Aha!” he chirps, and switches a switch. The droid comes to life. In a sweet voice, Trio asks, “How can I help you madam…..Howdoo canda aidoo poodoo?”
Rojic frowns. “Nearly there. Now…..Go around the ship and ask if anyone wants some supper, Trio.” Trio obliges. “-And try not to open any airlock doors….Again!” Rojic yells after her. A moment later, Trio finds Karnov and Niall, who are in the galley. They are silent and appear to be in prayer. Trio waits patiently.
“Dark in here isn’t it?” Niall says, eventually.
“Not to me. My eyes are fine in the dark!”
“Shame we can’t open the fridge for more illumination.”
“Ah…To bask in the glare of the fridge light….Its fire has truly gone out of the universe.”
They spend several more minutes of silence in reverential memory of the fridge light.
Rojic flutters past, and opens the fridge door. He is bathed in a bright, yellow-tinged glow. The others marvel. “It’s a miracle!” Karnov whoops. She considers dropping to her knees to worship.
“I never would have thought it possible!”
Rojic stops them. “Pfft! I got a friend to locate another. If anyone can, Kory can.”
“Kory can can-can? Can she do that?”
“Well it took a considerable effort, but I managed to source a pack of six spares.”
Niall turns to Joe-9T. “Guard these with your life!” Niall turns around, and spots the protocol droid. “ -And Trio’s life as well!”
“Will do sir. –though I don’t have a life to sacrifice…..Especially not for an inferior technical component.”
Very slowly Niall tells Joe-9T, “This light bulb is a god.”
“Not in my universe, sir.”
Rojic makes an adjustment. “There!”
“Sir, I will gladly sacrifice any of my circuits in defence of this holy light bulb.”
Rojic is pleased. “Haha!”
Karnov’s mind has been racing….It has only taken five minutes to come to this conclusion.
“Can have one?”
Joe-9T turns on her, and swings Sarah-Jane in her direction. “You’d better have a very good reason, Ma’am.”
Karnov outlines her thinking. “Well, I still need a component or two for my lightsabre project…. Junn said I need to put my soul into it….But I’m more of the opinion that one person hasn’t the gravitas that a whole community has…. We all revere the fridge light. And so if one of its brothers was elevated to a god….It would be an honour to have it at the heart of my lightsabre.”
Rojic can hardly contain himself. “Lightsabre? Pah!”
“-And what makes you such an expert?” Karnov says, through gritted teeth.
Rojic explains. “Well, you have a piece of tubing….And a lightbulb…..So, what you have there, my dear Karnov….” He pauses for dramatic effect. “What you have there…..IS A TORCH!!”
The others are silent in their appreciation for Rojic’s rhetoric, and the added punch of the second exclamation mark. There is a stunned silence.
Niall is about to add his scorn to Karnov’s project. He changes his mind. “Actually though technically right…..A lightsabre is a torch….Only where the light is strong enough to slice through just about anything.” He purrs, smoothing over ruffled feathers.
Karnov takes a spare bulb and heads off to the engineering bay. Some time later, she shouts in excitement. “Rojic! Come here!”
Rojic is trying to rest. “Oh….What is it?” He snarls.
“I didn’t realise that you has so many bits and pieces!” Karnov is quite excited. “Look….” She shows Rojic his accumulated junk in boxes. “There’s almost everything that I need!”
Rojic can see an opportunity here. “Okay….If you sort it, I’ll help you build it. –For my usual fee.”
Karnov is about to agree, when she hears Master Junn’s voice of warning in her head. She rounds on Rojic. “No. I’ll tell you what I need, and you can find them.” Rojic considers this. Usually he has Joe-9T and the astromech droids for company. “Your Jedi mind tricks won’t work on me, Karnov….Only money.”
“Okay. I’ll tell you what I need. You find it. Then I give you all my wages for the parts.” Karnov offers.
“Now you’re speaking my language!” Rojic whoops. He starts singing the song ‘Credits, credits, credits,’ by Aurek-Besh-Besh-Aurek.
“Nice tune, that.” Karnov tells him, handing over a box parked ‘machine parts’.
Rojic grins. “My favourite!”
Karnov grins. When Rojic is out of earshot, she sniggers. “All my wages! Ha!”
By teatime, all harsh words are forgotten. At least until Rojic asks, “Spicy tea anyone?” Karnov mishears, thinking he said “Salty tea?”
“Are you trying to poison me?” Karnov yells. “These gills are for decoration. –They aren’t for breathing!” Rojic soon points out the opposite. “No. They aren’t for decoration….-And they are for breathing….” He then adds a rather pointed, “-Stupid!”
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Half a day later, the planet of Chistophsis lies below them, sparkling with its natural mineral formations.
“Some say that the world is one big gemstone.” Niall tells the others as they approach. Rojic’s eyes glitter more than the planet. Niall continues, “Of course the majority of the ore isn’t the finest of grades, -though there is a lot of it. The Republic uses it for coating hull plates, making low-output weapons emitters, and all manner of industrial uses.”
“I bet Jimmi would have something poetic to say.”
“Something about glittering in darkness like tears in the rain.”
“C-Beams in time attacking the ships with fire.”
“Wet like the tears on the shoulder of Orion.”
There is a pause. “Eeew!”
Christophsis has a bustling export sector. They edge Storm Cutter into the stream of commercial ships and are directed to a docking spire, which looks as though its been carved from a kilometre-high lump of copper sulphate. Thousands of other ships are berthed there, either loading or unloading. Droids and aliens fill the walkways. The spires dot the main city of Cryanna and the crew get the impression that few ships actually get to touch the ground here.
“Remember where we parked the ship.”
“Pfft! It’s on a thousand-foot spire, right near the top!”
“Yes, but there are a hundred spires in this sector of the city. A score of sectors, plus the trade, commerce, and tourist transit hubs….”
“Okay, point taken. -Though ours is the only ship coloured pink.”
“Mmmm….Lovely pink.” Karnov says, “I don’t see that there is anything wrong with it.”
“Neither did the person who supplied the paint.”
“Who was that? Jimmi?”
They walk along a very narrow walkway. As they turn back toward Storm Cutter, they can see that she is perched on a spar, that extends from the spire. Anti-grav jets keep her balanced on the spar, which is only just as broad as the landing struts.
“Not much room for error.”
“I could fly Storm Cutter with my eyes closed.”
“Judging by the paint job, I think that would be for the best!”
They proceed further. Fitful gusts of wind threaten to blow them off the walkway completely, and send them to their deaths a thousand feet below on the crystalline plaza beneath.
“The one thing that this galaxy needs is health-and-safety.”
“Nah, -it’ll never catch on.”
“How about we go against the grain and install seatbelts aboard Storm Cutter?”
“Let me stop you there, by telling you that at hyperspace speeds, if you did hit something, -that seatbelts won’t be much use.”
“That’s a sobering thought.”
“That’s why we leave interstellar navigation to the droids.”
“You mean if Hen3ry pops a fuse in mid-flight we’d all end up atomised on the first stray asteroid.”
“Yup.”
“Ulp!”
After a pause, Karnov says, “Actually I think seatbelts are a very sensible idea.” The others laugh at her and mock. Karnov tells them to mark her words, but actually nothing untoward happens.
Once inside the docking spire, they can relax a bit. Within a few moments they ping D’Estrella, and are pinged back with the co-ordinates for ‘George.’ They pull up a map and plan their route. “We’re on an island around a lagoon….So….We’ll need to get a boat to the island where George is holed-up……Here.”
“Boat? Why did it have to be a boat?” Rojic asks.
“Coz otherwise, you’ll end up with very wet feet.” Karnov tells him.
“Not me, sister!” Rojic says, with feeling.
“Me either….” Karnov agrees, “I’m swimming across.”
“I ain’t going in no boat!” Rojic reiterates.
“I could levitate….And save myself the fare…..” Niall muses, but then adds. “But we are supposed to be keeping a low profile.”
“If you levitate across to the island. The whole planet’ll think it a miracle.”
Niall shrugs, and boards a boat. There is a sizeable flotilla here, and they all service every island. The trip across takes an hour or so. “Looks like this island is the spoil heap from a mine….” Rojic observes. “I suspect that the water is polluted too, seeing as it’s a funny colour compared to the open ocean….” This is directed at Karnov who has decided to swim after all. “Not my concern….” Karnov replies. “Though I think that the geography is a bit screwy…..”
“How so.”
“Well, islands don’t normally ring a lagoon like this, they form an atoll around some seismic or volcanic activity, and the nature of the ore is such that….”
“Let me stop you there.” Niall says.
“Why?”
“Well, first, you’re on an alien planet…”
“And?”
“Second…..” Niall grins as he peers over the fourth wall. “You might just be in a work of fiction….”
Rojic does some aerial scouting. “I think I can see where we’re headed…. I took it on my own recognisance, to do some reconnaissance, to recognise stuff during my reconnoitre, and I’m reporting back.”
They all give the usual response to such convoluted word-play and get ready move off.
The ferryman asks for the fare.
“I’m not paying him until we get to the other side.”
Niall glances at the ferryman. The man is wearing a dirty robe, has a skeletal look about him, and has a large blaster rifle trained on the boat’s drain plug.
“Okay…..” Niall says, stalling for time, and trying to keep everyone calm.
Rojic goes to get money from out of his pocket, only to find he has neither. Niall tells him, “Pay the man.” Rojic can only look sheepish. “I never carry money. -I’m like the emperor.”
“You are not like the emperor in any way. He’s five-ten, slim build, human, pale, and…. He’s really nice.” Karnov reminds him.
There is a chorus of ‘very nice man’ et-cetera, ad nauseum, et tu brute.
Niall is keeping calm. “I don’t carry money. The force will provide.”
Karnov is quick to respond. “That’s your mistress talking.”
Niall rounds on Karnov. “Well, do you have a better solution?”
“If the force will not provide…..We’ll resort to deadly force!”
“And that’s Master Junn talking!” Niall says, smugly.
Karnov can see the funny side. “Touché!”
Niall and Karnov hold one another’s gaze. “Well I’m not paying.”
“Well I’m not.”
“You are!”
“Not!”
“Are too.”
“-Are not too!”
“Are-too-dee-too!”
“Two-Bee-or not two-one-bee….Two….Too! -And back to you!”
This goes on for some time. In the end Rojic can stand no more. “Alright! I’ll pay! Just stop arguing!” He turns to the ferryman. Behind his back, Niall and Karnov bump fists.
Miraculously, a credit cylinder appears in Rojic’s hand. Karnov says, “I don’t even want to think about where he keeps that!”
“Somewhere water-tight.” Niall says with a shudder. Karnov trumps this comment. “I think Rojic’s so careful with his money, that he’s leak-tight.”
Niall has the last word. “I have to agree. Not even helium gas molecules could escape!”
Rojic starts to grumble. “I don’t see why I have to pay.”
Niall tells him straight. “There are those with money…..And those with lightsabres.”
Rojic concedes the point. “Grrrr!”
Their boat trip is uneventful. There might have been a writers’ block floating in the lagoon, which they cleverly skirt around. They disembark onto a shale beach, and above them are collections of miner’s huts, arranged in hexagons.
A short walk later and they approach one of the mining complexes. Six hexagonal huts arranged in a hexagon around a seventh -absent- hexagon.
“I’m sure this made a lot more sense on paper….” Karnov says, ruefully.
“The architectural style is early…..Maniac!” Niall tells her.
“Really? They let madmen design miner’s huts?” Karnov says, before realising how stupid it sounds.
“Yes they did. –Around the time they took the word ‘gullible’ out of the dictionary…..”
“Aha!” Karnov is prepared for this one. “Master Junn has taught me to question everything before taking it on face value, and to apply what I’ve learned to similar situations…..”
“-And?”
“-And I need to look that one up.”
“No time…Here we are.” Rojic reports. “At least I think we’re here….The numbering system for the huts is a bit complex.”
“Imagine if it were in Huttese….Who work in base eight.”
“But hut six of six in Huttese is still six.”
Karnov is dismissive. “Pfft! It’s not so difficult!”
Rojic swoops down. “Here’s the twenty one credits I owe you.”
“But there’s only seventeen here!” Karnov cries.
“Exactly. Huttese accountancy….Better even than Hollywood accounting!”
“Where’s Hollywood?”
“Somewhere on Kashyyykk, I think…..”
Niall puts a finger to his lips, and motions to the others to keep back. They can see the hut in question, and look out for signs of strangers or enemy agents. In the shadows alongside are two rather out-of-place Tusken Raiders.
“Strange for Tuskens to come this far out….On a slightly damp Tuesday afternoon.”
“Yeah, I heard that Tuesdays was Bantha steak and sand-dancing night.”
“Strange too that their blaster rifles are standard Republic issue, only sprayed khaki.”
Karnov’s brain is doing that questioning thing again. “So why are they here?”
“Trying to blend in with the locals….Only failing.”
They decide to stride over. Two raw recruits are huddled in the alley. Niall can see that they are terrified.
“Why not send clones?” Karnov asks.
“Maybe that’s a bit too obvious. Two clones standing on the corner in full battle armour.”
“True, but civvies would be better.”
“Maybe their civilian clothes are in the wash… Who cares?”
Niall beams at the two ill-disguised soldiers. “It’s okay. We’re Republic. – Padawans Karnov and Killian…..We’re here for George.”
“George?”
Niall indicates with a nod, and taps his nose to indicate a secret. Karnov lets the wind open her robe a bit to reveal a lightsabre.
The recruits are relived that Karnov’s open robe hasn’t revealed any more. “Aha! George….”
Our heroes and Rojic approach the door. “I suppose we’d better knock….”
“No let’s blunder straight in…..I’m sure the booby traps are only semi lethal….”
“There’s no such thing as ‘semi-lethal.’ Either something kills you or it doesn’t.”
“Like rhetoric.”
“Like rhetoric….”
“Or pregnancy.”
“I wouldn’t know, Karnov.”
They press the button for the bell. It doesn’t blow their hand off. It buzzes instead.
“Strange that a bell should buzz.”
They knock the secret knock. That buzzes too.
“Hmmmm……”
Finally they call softly and the door opens a crack. A blaster pistol shows through the crack.
“We’re Padawans Killian and Karnov. We’re here to rescue you!”
There is a buzzing noise. Helpfully Rojic responds with “Swordfish!”
A Techno-Union foreman is inside the miner’s hut. He lets them in. “Le’an Zix I presume?” Niall purrs at him. Inside, it is dark and dingy, -at least to Rojic and Niall. Karnov can see fine. The foreman introduces himself in a peculiar buzzy and slightly broken basic. “Yezz. I ha..vvv bee..n ex..zz..pecting zz you..bzz.”
While the apprentice Jedi check over the hut and security arrangements, Rojic flies around George. George buzzes again. “I hazz co..zz..ordinatezz. Sce..zz..uled flight..zz.”
“We could get him off in Storm Cutter.” Rojic speculates.
“Nowhere to put down….Not without attracting a lot of attention….Everything goes on and off planet via the docking spires. Besides, Storm Cutter isn’t exactly inconspicuous.”
Karnov thinks it through. “Also, public place with lots of civilians. Difficult for a lone gunman to make a clean kill. – Especially with two alert Jedi in close escort.”
“Ezzcort. Yezz. To shuttle co..zz..ordinatezz.” George adds.
“Okay. –When is the next scheduled flight to Coruscant?”
“Tonight, nine o’clock.”
“It’s lunchtime now….” Rojic starts to say.
“With you, lunchtime is every hour and a half….But for once you’re right. It’s about lunchtime. That means around nine hours to lie low, keep a low profile and hide.”
Karnov makes a decision. “We’ll move out. Maybe make a diversion on the way. A false trail. If this place has been compromised in any way, we could be waiting for an attack. –Two idiot soldiers outside don’t help either.”
Niall agrees. “We’ll sneak out the back door. Head around the island to a boat and head back to Cryanna city.”
“We’ll need a disguise….George isn’t exactly the sort to blend in.”
They hunt around. With a few modifications, they use old miner’s overalls, the curtains and other scraps of material to disguise George.
“There, even his own wife wouldn’t recognise him!”
“Wife..zz.”
At this point there is a noise at the front door. Niall indicates to the others to get George out of the hut by the back door. “I’ll stall ‘em! Get George away!” The others comply. Niall waits as long as he dares, and then opens the door a crack. His lightsabre held behind him ready to strike.
“Pip Pip…..Whistle. Pip…Bleep!”
Niall isn’t sure, but it looks like a cleaning droid. It certainly has brushes and mops and a smell of cleaning fluid….But one can’t tell for sure. “Not today, thank you!” He tells the droid. “Whistle, buzz. Pip! Pirp!”
Niall goes to shut the door, but the droid is insistent. He makes sure that the others have made their escape.
The droid keeps up a constant and annoying beeping.
Niall concedes. “Okay. Let me tidy up….Come back in….Twenty minutes.”
“Pip! Pip! Beep!”
Niall closes the door. He puts a chair under the handle and escapes out the back. The others are making good their escape.
“What was it?”
“Cleaning droid….But it might have been a scout or a bomb, or something else.”
“Best make some ground.”
For a heavy cyborg, George can move surprisingly swiftly. Soon they have skirted around the coast and have spied a boat. Better still, there is a ticket booth manned by a protocol droid.
“How my I help, sir?”
Rojic flaps over. “We’d like a ticket to ‘slice’ island.”
“Checking sir….Not in my databank….”
Rojic looks concerned. “I think there’s a spot of rust over your secondary core processor. Maybe If I make an adjustment…..”
The droid stares at him, not comprehending. “Maybe I can prepare a relaxing….Bzzzzt!” Rojic has sidled around the droid, and shoves a data-spike into the droid’s brain. Quick as a flash, they take George’s remaining clothes and dress the droid.
“It won’t pass close examination….But at twenty paces, it might just pass for him.”
“Make it cover a lot of ground erratically. Dodging and weaving, then board a boat to someplace far away.”
Rojic presses buttons on the data-spike. “Done!”
They leave the driod for a minute before it shuffles off. Then they head for the nearest boat, throw a tarpaulin over George, and speed off.
Some time later, they arrive at the docks in Cryanna city. They manage to sneak George through the moorings and into the backstreets. A few minutes scouting later, and they are heading for a sleazy cantina. “Bzz….” George says. “Muszzt holo call.” He leads them toward a public terminal. “Not here!” Niall hisses at him. “Muszzt make call..zz.” George replies, with some urgency.
“Okay….But not here!” They drag George into a holo-archive. There is no one in the shop to greet them. George plugs in. A hologram of a female Skakoan appears.
“I’m.zz alivezz. You are in zz..danger! Leave..zz now bzzt! Meet..zz at..z where we had our..zz zz Honey..zz..moon. No Wait..zz! Where we were going..zz to have out honeymoon.”
“I lo..zz..vvvvve you. Bzz!” She says.
George snaps off the communicator.
“Great woman..zz..Great wife….Zz”
“She must love you very much.”
“Very much…zz….Yezz.”
Niall is waiting at the door. “I think I an see a cantina at the end of the street. It looks like a seedy space-dive. We should be right at home….So long as George keeps his head down and his mouth shut.”
The others agree. They make their way to the cantina unharmed. They settle into the dingiest most-poorly-lit booth. “We’ll lie low, sip our drinks and not get noticed.”
A second later, Rojic is flapping wildly across the bar, and laying credits on a table, where several aliens are playing ‘find-the-lady.’
“Can’t lose! Can’t lose!” Rojic chuckles to himself. He puts a few credits down and loses…This is to soften them up. More credits emerge, and he starts to play in earnest. A few rounds later and hundreds of credits are riding on finding the lady. Time for Rojic to clean up.
“Find the lady….Luck be a lady…. Where is she?” A moment later, Rojic pounces. “Middle…..Er….I mean left!”
“Sorry, but you said middle.”
“I meant left.”
“But you said middle first. Didn’t he?” The Mirialan woman says to her cronies. Sensing a fight if Rojic doesn’t back down -and blowing their cover if Karnov and Niall have to rescue him, Rojic does the decent thing. “You’re right of course. Here, take my credits.” He offers, through clenched tusks.
“Thank you. Do come again when you’ve got some more!” She tells him sweetly.
Rojic scowls. He fumes. He rages. Luckily he doesn’t make a scene. He almost cries. He tries to make up the defecit by whiling away the afternoon playing dejaric, sabaac and I-spy among themselves. By eight o’ clock they are bored, on each other’s nerves, and ready to make a move. The street is quiet. They move off to the Empire Spire, where the shuttle ‘Ten Viiro’ is scheduled to make a stop en route to Coruscant. After a little difficulty getting tickets and not having the right currency, they settle down in a departure lounge. With minutes to go, an announcement is made that the shuttle has been delayed. Having waited all afternoon and most of the evening, Rojic is getting restless. “Why don’t you go fly outside….After all we’re only a kilometer up. The wind won’t be that strong, and I’m sure those dark and stormy clouds don’t mean anything.”
Rojic sees sense. “I just want to put George on the shuttle and head home.”
“Coffee?” Karnov offers.
Niall shakes his head. “I think the last thing Rojic needs is more coffee. Besides, that ‘famous Jawa’ is pretty potent stuff. He’s buzzing like a hummingbird as it is.”
While Rojic flaps dejectedly, they watch the weather. A storm has brewed up, and soon thunder is rumbling, lightning flashing, and rain is pelting the tower. The whole structure rocks gently in the wind. “I hope this things gonna hold.”
“Me too. I think it’s the same vintage as Storm Cutter, and about as space-worthy too.”
“I got a bad feeling when I saw it was called the ‘Empire Spire.’ –Seeing as the last empire was two millennia ago….The Sith Empire.” Niall makes a small gesture at the word ‘Sith,’ as though he’s warding off bad luck. “I don’t suppose they had a great public works scheme to keep these old places in tip-top condition.”
“So this could be anything up to two thousand years old.”
“Yep.”
“So…. Nearly as old as Storm Cutter, and Mama for that matter.”
“Say that a little louder…She’s sitting right behind you.”
Rojic spins around. Only an Ithorian is there, looking slightly bemused.
“You tease!” Rojic scolds.
George looks concerned. –That is as much as an alien in a face-mask, and thick eye-goggles can do. “I bzzz..zz..Don’t have any money..zz.”
Before Niall and Karnov can do the whole ‘I don’t carry money’ routine again, Rojic flies up to the plate and offers to pay for a ticket. –Though with a lot of grumbling an moaning. “I can’t see why we can’t take Storm Cutter back.”
Can I say, “Like a Herglic on Mrlssti.”
“If you must.”
Rojic is still objecting as he flutters off. “I’ll be taking the funds out of the guild bank, you know….” And as an afterthought, adds, “With interest.”
Goeorge has the final word. In an electronic buzz, he says, “The Tech..zz..no Union thank..zz you for your..zz zzacrifice!”
An announcement comes over the tannoy. The shuttle to Coruscant, Ten Viiro is going to be delayed again. “More waiting. -I don’t know if I can hold on any longer.”
“You should have gone before we left!”
The storm outside gets worse. The rain lashes at the windows and rattles on the superstructure. Thunder rumbles and lightning flashes. The lights flicker in sympathy with both. Several pools of water from where the roof hasn’t been maintained. The wind howls mournfully, and the atmosphere is tense. The departure lounge slowly fills with people, droids and aliens. All waiting out the storm. The structure groans a little and a distinctive swaying is evident. Protocol droids try to keep a lid on the tension. Rojic stares out through the leaking mineral windows. He looks longingly over the city shrouded in darkness and glistening in the rain. “Funny, but it doesn’t seen so high up from here.”
“Maybe you should throw a rock off the top, to calculate the precise height.”
“But do we know the gravity here?” Rojic counters.
“I’m sure we could look it up.” Niall says.
“-And look like a complete tourist at the same time.” Karnov reminds them in a moment of rare insight.
“I wonder how long it would take Rojic to fall that distance.” Niall muses.
Rojic is defensive. “It’d take a long time….” He flutters his wings to remind them. He coughs politely, “Wings!”
“I was thinking of clubbing him unconscious with the rock first.”
Rojic starts blustering. “I thought you Jed….” He corrects himself. “Padawans were above evil thoughts like that.”
“I am. That’s not a dark-side thought. -Just a practical solution to a mundane problem.”
Karnov seals the deal. “I vote for putting the rocks in his pockets.” She says. “But anyways, anyone for another drink?”
“Make mine a double…..On the rocks!” Niall tells her, with a glint in his eye, then adds, “And I mean ice!”
After yet another delay, the lights of the shuttle can be seen in the distance. Several hundred eyes turn skyward. A couple of lightning flashes later, and Niall and Karnov get an uneasy feeling. Maybe it’s the years of space travel, or possibly some sixth sense, or even the force….Something is wrong…Very wrong.
“They’re not coming in to land….” Niall says, staring through the window and trying to make out something through the storm. “No….The approach is all wrong….Like…..” Karnov says, before a streak of light erupts from the shuttle’s defensive cannons, and a big chunk of wall explodes inward.
“Coming in sideways….For an attack!” Niall completes the sentence. This is all the time the crowd need to start panicking. Karnov spins around, makes sure George is in relative safety and starts appealing for calm. Niall sees the shuttle in another flash of lightning. It has turned broadside, and is opening up with all the starboard side cannons. A large window shatters, and sends shards of crystal across the room. Niall’s fists clench for a second, but his training kicks in. Calmly, he closes his eyes, ignores the screams of the crowd, and concentrates….
A moment later, the pilot of the shuttle imagines an interceptor wing of Republic fighters on fast approach. She yanks on the controls and with a final burst from the guns, heads around the spire, hoping for cover. Niall’s illusion has bought some time….Albeit seconds. Karnov is directing the crowd to the stairs, the goods lifts and the passenger lifts. Some enterprising citizens are helping the trapped and the wounded. The spire rocks under fire, as big chunks of superstructure are blown away. The floor is no longer completely level, and the wind and rain are lashing in through the gaps in the windows and walls. Rojic starts on an intercept course for the goods lift. George sinks into his seat, keeping a low profile. Karnov instructs the droids to usher the crowd away from danger. – They respond, and the lull in the gunfire from the shuttle calms the crowd a small amount.
When actual Republic interceptors don’t materialise, the ruse is over. A moment later, and the shuttle swings around for another pass, and the guns open up again. Niall stands in the midst of blaster bolts. More chunks of building rain down, and the structure shudders under the onslaught. Niall has spotted something, and as Karnov comes level he points them out. “Look!”
“I don’t see anything!”
“Wait for the lightning, then look at the rear of the shuttle!”
A flash lights up the sky. Rain pelts in, stinging their faces.
Niall points. “Troopers on the loading ramp….Small arms!”
As if on cue, the troopers fire a long volley. A couple of the crowd are hit, the rest withdraw hastily. The troopers discontinue firing, and start descending on grappling lines. By the time the crowd has cleared from the walkway, four troopers have dropped to the floor. The two Jedi apprentices are waiting for them. There is an almighty flash. Either the lightning has struck the tower, or one of the troopers has tipped off a flash grenade….Either way, our two heroes stand resolute. A protocol droid announces helpfully that enemy troopers have entered the base, before being shut down.
Over the seething crowd, Rojic growls something about lobbing a thermal detonator into the shuttle’s engine. Niall shrugs. “No thermal detonators! Besides, there may be civilian hostages aboard!”
“Then get Storm Cutter to come and rescue my credits…. I mean me…Us….Er….Them….!” Rojic points to the crowd, who are not stampeding, but are nonetheless pushing and shoving one another to get to safety. The shuttle stands off a little, and the guns fizz again. This time the whole tower slews a few feet to one side, and several wheeled luggage trolleys start to slide left. Against the tide, a number of maintenance droids have come to life. Karnov reaches into a pocket and pushes a comms button. Back on Storm Cutter, Joe-9T’s eyes light up. “Dampers off.” Joe-9T says to himself. “G-force limiters off…..Oh they weren’t on anyway…..!” The ship executes a fifteen-G turn, almost tearing the deflector dish off in the process. A few seconds later, and the old freighter is but a streak of pink across the stormy sky, racing to Karnov’s location.
Jo-9T’s voice crackles on their communicators. Niall snaps an order. “Stand by to evac civilians.” This is countered by Rojic, who chimes in, “Evac me and my money!” In a panicked and slightly squeaky voice.
In front of the two apprentice Jedi are three troopers. A Trandoshan, a cyborg, and a Bothan. They lose no time in laying down fire with their blasters.
Karnov takes on the leftmost trooper. The Trandoshan takes a blow to the chest from Karnov’s lightsabre. Karnov is about to follow up with a blow to the head with the hilt of the weapon, when the blaster discharges a full shot into Karnov at point-blank range. Karnov staggers back, almost falling onto a Farghul girl, who has stepped forward to back him up. The girl’s eyes light up at the prospect of a free fishy snack coming her way! Karnov is in a bad way, and manages to gargle. “I am not a fish!” before passing out. The girl weighs up her options: To feast on the seafood, to draw a blaster, or to aid the fallen padawan. She chooses the last option, and a small medical stim appears in her hand. She jabs it into Karnov’s arm. Karnov’s eyes flutter for a second. Niall is in unison with the cyborg, he snaps off a shot from his offhand, and closes with the lightsabre. Karnov’s lightsabre has dropped to the floor and is slowly sliding along the sloping floor toward the edge.
Rojic is confronted with a pile of boxes, crates, luggage and a large loading droid in the goods lift. There are also frightened citizens who can’t wait for the ‘doors open’ sign. Nor will they heed the ‘20 people/500 kg’ limit. Rojic shrieks at the driod to clear the boxes, and with a hissing of pistons and actuators, the droid sweeps all the contents of the lift before it. Rojic orders it to turn around and plug into the lift mechanism to boost power. “Better hurtling to the ground at double speed, than falling to the ground from a half-mile up using nothing but gravity!” He thinks grimly. The droid turns and tries to comply.
Karnov sucks in a big breath as the med-pack starts its work. It is only a thin smear of Kolto, with adrenaline, but it is enough to revive the fallen Quarren. “I’m Karnov.” She says to the Farghul girl. “Carad Oss.” The girl says back, and with that, draws her blaster and shoots the Trandoshan. As she does so, the shuttle fires again, and the whole spire lurches. Rojic was slicing into the droid at the time and doesn’t see the wall coming until too late. The wall clunks him a good one in the head. He sees stars. The lurch forward has an effect on Karnov too. Combined with the slippery deck, Karnov and Carad start sliding down the walkway. Over the edge is a kilometer drop…. This prompts Carad to dig her claws into the sliding Padawan. It isn’t pretty, and Karnov’s face resembles a scratching post, but it saves her from sliding to her death. “You look like battered fish.” Carad says to Karnov, who is too weak to cringe.
Rojic is cursing. The emergency slicing has worked, and the droid extends a data spike. –Only there is a problem with the interface- Due to the twisting and buckling of the building, the scomp port is no longer at the correct height!
Niall is rudely crowding the Trandoshan’s personal space, but manages to clear it quite well with a sweep of the lightsabre. A second backswing, and the Trandoshan fires his last shot. – It glances into Niall. However, that is the end of the scaly alien, as chunks slither and slide all over the walkway. Although there is no blood, the rain has made the floor slick and slippery. A Trandoshan body part slides into Karnov’s lightsabre, knocking it perilously close to the edge. The other troopers rush their shots and merely blast the wall. Carad shoots the Bothan, and manages to knock her back, but alas, not enough to tip her over the end of the walkway. The Bothan snarls. Carad hisses back. Karnov sits up, and with her blaster, tries to finish what Carad started, but misses. In the meantime, Storm Cutter has docked at a nearby walkway, and Joe-9T has come out striding through the crowd with Sarah-Jane. Unsurprisingly, the bodies clear all around him. Karnov spies her lightsabre, which is perilously close to the edge of the walkway, with another chunk of Trandoshan trooper about to knock it over the brink. The cyborg spies it too, but in the milliseconds decision whether to shoot it or kick it, the weapon spins once, and surges into Karnov’s hand.
Carad helps Karnov to her feet. “Just throwing you a line….” She purrs, “Saving your skin….Getting you off the hook, stopping you becoming Bothan bait.” As she taunts Karnov, she manages to get another hit on the Bothan. The distraction is all Niall needs and he plunges the lightsabre through the creature, killing it instantly. Karnov uses Niall as cover, and surprises the cyborg. The half-man half machine raises a blaster, but in two neat strokes, hybrid parts fall to the floor and one-by-one, they slide off the edge and into the inky blackness below.
Joe-9T’s relentless stomping across the departure lounge has inspired a young man. Orre Ranaara is following closely. As the crowd part, Orre spies a speeder moored on the spire. – Unfortunately it is on the other side of a pane of glass. – And not just ordinary glass either. This is thick and toughened glass. Orre beats on the glass with the butt of a blaster, but without success in breaking it. He turns in desperation to a nearby Wookiee. “Oi! Help me!”
The Wookiee growls back. “Grrrrrr.”
“Please?”
George, meantime, has slid from behind his table, and has a hold-out blaster. Joe-9T has almost caught up with Niall and Karnov. The Ithorian from before steps in behind George. A walking cane extends and becomes an electro-staff . The ends crackle with energy. The Ithorian lunges at George, who buzzes in time with the crackling, the pike’s charged end implanted squarely in George’s back. Purple sparks play over his body.
The shuttle opens up again. More blaster-cannon bolts slam into the spire. It rocks under the impact of the onslaught. Large chunks of beams and support struts crash to the floor, which is now at an alarming angle. Niall and the second Bothan trade a shot for a lightsabre. Between them they make short work of the Bothan, but Niall is hit and nearly stumbles off the ledge. Karnov calls on the force to speed to Niall’s aid, grabbing him and stopping him from toppling over. The ledge lurches again, making progress back slow. Carad grabs at them both, and pulls them back.
Rojic has got the goods lift going again. His technical skills have kicked in and he’s managed to come up with a workaround. The lift doors slide open, and then close again. – But not before a cowardly Amarin slides into the lift, and punches the ‘doors-close’ button. The lift starts to descend. The crowd scream at Rojic. Rojic screams at the droid, and reverses the polarity. The lift ascends. When the doors open, the Amarin man is hauled out, and it is lucky that he avoids a lynching for his selfishness. The crowd surge into the lift. It descends rapidly for a floor or two, and then stops – The buckling of the tower has distorted the shaft, making a complete descent impossible. The people crawl out through the gap, and yell at Rojic to repeat the process.
Meanwhile, George is under attack. The Ithorian stabs at him again with the electro-staff. The discharge makes the air crackle, the Ithorian cackle and George crumble. As the Ithorian goes for another lunge, Karnov reaches out with the force and tries to remove the weapon from its hands. However, Karnov isn’t that strong with the force, but crucially manages to deflect the business-end away from George. Her work done for a second, she concentrates on ushering more civilians to the various exits. Joe-9T can deal with the Ithorain.
Joe-9T does just that. The grim stomping comes to an ominous stop. Sarah-Jane spins up, and a gout of super-heated plasma lands squarely in the Ithorian’s back! The attack spurs on the creature, but not before Niall has used the force to move George out of harm’s way….For now. “For knowledge and defence, never attack.” He intones, practicing what he has been taught. Rojic, meantime has directed the stragglers in the crowd to board a shuttle on the level below. The Ithorian turns slowly to confront Joe-9T. However, Joe-9T isn’t pleased to see him, and neither is Sarah-Jane. She coughs her displeasure, and the Ithorian drops at Joe-9T’s feet. Joe-9T stands astride the body, like a big game hunter. A stream of bolts slowly fry the Ithorian’s body.– A second later and the tower lurches. The body slides out from under Joe-9T, and over toward Niall, who stops the slide with his foot.
Meanwhile, Orre and the Wookiee have patched up their differences. Orre says “Pretty-please with Bantha-cream and sugar on the top.” Between them they try again, and finally the glass smashes into a million bits. The expectant crowd surge forward, but a growl from the Wookiee and a blaster carbine waved in their direction make them see sense. Even so, the speeder is quickly full to overflowing in a few seconds. Orre jumps in. “I’ll be back!” He shouts to the Wookiee, who grunts in response. Orre lets the speeder slip sideways and down, and in a moment, the passengers are scrambling for safety on a lower level. Orre guns the engine, and makes the return trip in less than a minute. His ferrying has relived the pressure somewhat.
“What with my piloting and your howling,” He yells over the noise, “It’s a wonder that there’s anyone left to save!”
Rojic flaps over to join Niall. Karnov has an idea. “Why not fly to the shuttle.”
“With a grenade.” Niall adds. “If you’re a good Toydarian, we might even let you keep the pin!”
“Very funny.” Rojic snarls at him. “What happened to ‘never attack’”
“I’m not doing the attacking, I’m letting you do the attacking.”
“With the force.” Rojic counters.
“On the contrary. The force doesn’t work on your kind, so I’m using money. My mistress is rather ambivalent about cold-hard cash….So….”
“So I’m still not doing it. Even for a lot of money.”
Niall changes tack. “Imagine me giving you a ton of money. –Twenty tons? A hundred tons?”
“I do….All the time. I’m still not flying into an enemy shuttle!”
This gives Karnov an idea. “If your little blue friend won’t go, then….”
“He’s not my friend.” Niall and Rojic reply in unison.
There is no time to argue further, as the shuttle blasts more chunks off the spire, and several large parts of it start crashing down. The whole structure lurches to one side, making crossing the floor a downhill or uphill experience. Several repair droids turn up, struggling for traction on the sloping surface. Karnov shrugs at them. “That's funny, the damage doesn't look as bad from in here.”
Rojic turns to look at a holo-feed. It shows external images of the tower, rocking under the onslaught. He switches it off. “No need to panic the civilians.” Joe-9T’s impassive face looks rather disappointed. Niall yells at the driod. “Quick! Back to Storm Cutter. Bring her up nice and close. Open the cargo bay and load up with these folks!” He indicates the remaining civilians. Joe-9T hesitates for a second. Karnov gives one of her ‘We haven’t’ got time for this nonsense’ faces, and Joe-9T complies. A few seconds later, and the crowd are clambering over the slope, over the sofa and into the hold of Storm Cutter. Rojic goes to move off. “Oh no you don’t,” Karnov warns. “You’re coming with me.” Rojic goes to open his mouth, but is dragged to the lip of the walkway, now at a jaunty angle, and quivering. Niall takes his cue from this, and ushers more passengers aboard Storm Cutter. Joe-9T asks whether to open the door to the Captain’s cabin. “Not my decision to take.” Niall says, evasively. Just then, the spire rocks alarmingly, and the gap between the walkway and the ship is too big for any more evacuees to cross. Relived of the decision, Hen3ry knocks off the hover jets and they descend rapidly to a lower floor, and safety.
The last lurch of the building has brought Karnov and Rojic closer to the attacking shuttle. In a leap of faith as well as a literal leap, Karnov crosses the gap. She slips and slides on the ramp of the shuttle before finding her feet. Rojic flits over like a humming bird, blaster drawn. His curses are lost in the storm. A convenient roll of thunder drowning out his expletives.
The shuttle is a squat tube shape, lined with seats. Most of these are filled with frightened-looking passengers. Two large Gamorrean guards are standing over them, ensuring compliance. Rojic shoots one of the guards, making him squeal. However, Karnov isn’t taking prisoners, and she sweeps forward with her lightsabre drawn. The first guard goes down in one blow, the other is injured on the backswing. Between them, they make short work of the second Gamorrean. The shuttle’s guns fire for the last time, almost toppling the top section of the docking spire. Niall, Joe-9T and the rest of the survivors are holding on for their lives. A few twisted girders, a power conduit and a mass of fibre-optic cables is all that is keeping the entire top section from hurtling to the ground, half a mile below them. Around them, several bodies slide out into space and fall like leaves to the plaza below.
By this time, Karnov is cutting through the bulkhead with her lightsabre. A single Weequay woman is in the pilot seat. At the sound of intruders, she stops her firing the ships guns. –In the nick of time too! Karnov is about to ask for her surrender, -and indeed it would appear that she is about to do just that, when Rojic’s blaster goes off, hitting the woman in the chest. This changes the dynamic somewhat, and the woman whips out her own blaster, holding it so that Rojic can see all the way down the barrel. Karnov isn’t in the mood for killing, and tells her firmly to “Put it down!”
“Throw the bed on the gun!” Rojic yelps in excitement and fear. There is a second of disbelief, and a short stand-off. Karnov starts moving the lightsabre into a position to strike. The woman sees sense and complies. “I’m only the pilot….Don’t shoot.” She pleads, and then adds, “–Again!” They disarm her. Karnov steps back to calm the passengers, and Rojic starts guiding the shuttle down to a lower altitude to let them disembark.
With the woman secure, Karnov turns to Rojic. “I thought you were going to shoot her.”
“I did shoot her.”
“Okay. I thought you were going to shoot her…. -Again.”
“I did shoot her….again!” Rojic says, calmly turning back to the console.
Karnov can’t believe what she’s been hearing. “What!” She demands.
Rojic lets the enormity of the situation ride for a moment. “In the head…..” Karnov is incandescent.
“On stun.” Rojic adds, tossing it in casually, like a grenade.
Karnov calms down. “Phew!” I thought you’d killed her.
“No. -That’s for the Jedi to do.”
“Jedi don’t execute prisoners.”
“Correct. They send them to prison. Cooped up in a ten-by-ten cell for years on end. It’s another form of death. –Death by boredom.” Rojic puts on a pleading voice, “Karnov, if you ever need to send me to the jail, -please just shoot me first.”
“Don’t worry,” Karnov says soothingly. “I won’t let you go to jail.”
“Thanks. ‘Coz, -you know- I’ve done ‘questionable things.’”
“The reason I won’t let you go to jail, is because I’ll be on crowd control duty. –There’ll be queues around the block wanting to shoot you!” Karnov turns on her heel, and with a flourish, strides from the bridge of the shuttle.
Emergency vehicles arrive at the spire -and a good thing too. The whole of the top section is teetering on a knife edge. “Good thing there wasn’t half a ton of gold, trying to tip it over.” Niall muses. Rojic is more upbeat. “Not a problem for me….I could fly over and remove the bullion ingot by ingot.”
“-Only they weigh several kilos each.” Niall points out.
Rojic curses. “Why is everything that’s valuable, so damned heavy?”
The remaining civilians are air-lifted to safety. The injured are taken for treatment, and the dead are taken away. There is a quick count up. “Eighty civilians dead.” Niall reports. “Shocking.”
“There must have been a leak somewhere. – George’s location must have got out.”
“The hijackers took the shuttle not long before they attacked. –No wonder the flight was delayed.”
“We should have smelled a womp-rat.” Rojic adds, sensibly.
Karnov and Niall look at one another. Finally, Karnov says, “Don’t blame yourself. There’s a war on, there are casualties. Sometimes they are civilian casualties. That’s the reality. George can do some good. His defection might save hundreds, or thousands, maybe even millions of lives.”
“But is even one innocent life too high a price?”
“That’s war. It’s horrible, but you have to play the percentages.”
In the confusion, they smuggle George onto Storm Cutter after all, and blast off for Coruscant once more.
Niall broods for a while. Finally he confides in Karnov, “A while ago, I’d have gone and blasted a hundred droids over this kind of thing.”
Karnov smiles. “I know.” She says, “How does it feel?”
Niall sighs. “Nowadays? -Empty.”
“Then maybe it’s time to fill the void.”
“You’re starting to sound like Mistress Luce.”
“Maybe I am.” Karnov says matter-of-factly. “-Just maybe I am!”
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Footnotes.